The Grim Reaper Goes to Scotland
The problem with taking American kids to live in England is that no matter what you do they’re still, well, American. They can call their friends “mate,” play “stuck in the mud” instead of “freeze tag,” and eat biscuits, but when it comes to Halloween, I’m telling you, they’re going to want to trick-or-treat.
The first year we lived in England we told them that people didn’t really trick-or-treat but it was like telling them that people didn’t really eat or sleep. It was crazy talk.
So we wandered around the neighborhood, looking for houses with porch lights on. When my kids yelled “trick-or-treat” our neighbors looked at them blankly for a moment and then got it, and ran to find something to put into their bag. Few people actually had candy to give but one person did give them potatoes.
We stood on the street while they went up to one house. When they came back to us Charlie said, “We saw a naked butt!” Apparently not expecting visitors, some guy was running around the house naked. That’s when we went home.
*
The second year we decided to avoid the whole thing and vacation in Scotland around that time. We made plans to go to the Scottish Crannog Center on Loch Tay on Halloween night. A crannog is a circular dwelling built on a lake. They date back thousands of years, and the Crannog Center was having a Celtic Samhain festival on Halloween.
Charlie, age 6, planned to dress as a pirate, and Kyla, 9, would be the Grim Reaper. The first problem we encountered was the scythe. It was a good 6 inches too long to fit into the suitcase and I knew that the days of carrying scythes onto airplanes were over. I told my husband, Stan, the problem, and without a word he cut it in half with a kitchen knife and threw some superglue into the suitcase.
“Will superglue put a plastic scythe back together?” I asked doubtfully.
“Superglue puts everything back together.”
*
In Scotland we found out that superglue does not put a plastic scythe back together, but liberal amounts of scotch tape does. At the Samhain Festival, Kyla’s mood darkened. A large bearded man dressed in a black robe, a mask, and hiking shoes rhythmically banged on a drum, announcing, “We will walk through the woods and send away the evil spirits by yelling Wooo!”
This struck Kyla as hokey, and she was looking skeptical and annoyed. Luckily, a Grim Reaper can get away with looking, well, grim, so I ignored her souring mood and we joined the procession. The woods were populated by skeletons hanging from trees, and by people dressed as demons crouching by the path.
“Wooooo!” Charlie yelled. He was in his element.
Kyla was not doing any “Woo-ing.” “You’re not scaring away any demons,” I told her, and she shot me a look.
“Now we will walk around the talisman three times anti-clockwise” boomed the bearded leader. “We will form a spiral – a sacred shape!”
Charlie solemnly made his way around the talisman, and the Grim Reaper rolled her eyes.
Finally we made it back to the festival site. Kyla was losing patience with this event. “Is this thing almost over?” she asked.
“We haven’t even had the sacrifice yet.”
This got her attention. “The sacrifice?”
I nodded toward a ram made of wicker, in the middle of a circle of logs.
“Now we set fire to the wicker ram!” announced the leader, and several masked women touched torches to the ram as the robed man continued to beat the drum. The ram went up in flames. The horns surrendered to the flame, and then the body started to buckle.
The pirate howled in delight. The Grim Reaper scowled some more. And on the way back to the inn, we gave them both a crapload of candy. They’re American kids, after all.
October 29th, 2008 | by Jody Mace 19 comments
1. Sandra Foyt on October 29th, 2008
Sure, I can see how living in Europe might be amazing, but missing trick or treating on Halloween? That’s painful.
2. Kayt Sukel on October 29th, 2008
Oh. my. goodness.
I may have just peed my pants. And I’m now wishing we were spending Halloween in Scotland.
3. CanCan (Mom Most Traveled) on October 29th, 2008
Maybe that naked guy was a nudist for Halloween?
Too funny!
4. Carolina on October 29th, 2008
wow This reminds me a lot of my college days at UCSC…except there the nudists rode bikes around the fires and drums (they wore helmets of course).
5. Jane Rytina on October 29th, 2008
When I read this, I thought Taggart was going to turn up (that comment is for the benefit of UK people only). Awesome article. Thanks.
6. Michelle D on October 30th, 2008
I think this may actually be the funniest post I’ve read on travelsavvymom yet. Howling with laughter.
Not least because I can absolutely picture not just me doing this but also my kids having exactly the same reactions (to the mythical chanting, fire-building activities).
Go on read my Halloween post. Made even funnier by your sacrificial ram-bonfire above. Cannot wait to read your Hogmanay post.
7. Fiona on October 30th, 2008
I grew up in Scotland and we always went “guising” which is similar to dressing up here and going trick-or-treating. We used to visit about 8 or so houses in our little hamlet who all had treats for us. I loved Halloween.
However, we didn’t have bright orange cup cakes in Safeway or any decorations, which was a culture shock for me when I moved to the US 6 years ago!
Isn’t culture fascinating.
8. Kristy Hall on October 30th, 2008
Without proper context that burning bull photo is totally terrifying and far more intense that most kids’ American Halloweens.
We were in Thailand a few years ago on Halloween and I was really surprised to see pumpkin decorations and such in Bangkok. No trick or treating but definitely a retail holiday
9. Veronica on October 30th, 2008
I loved it! But, to compensate, they do have Bonfire Night, where you can wheel around (in a stroller) an effigy of some poor Catholic revolutionary named Guy and get money just for saying “Penny for the Guy.”
Then, on November 5th, you build a bonfire, burn him and set off fireworks (paid for by said Penny). My parents wouldn’t let me participate as I was a Catholic and I’m still annoyed about that.
10. Jody on October 30th, 2008
Fiona, Yeah, the inn-keeper at Scotland told us about guising. She said that the kids will do a little something, like a little song or a joke, to get their treat. My kids were like, “No WAY am I going around singing a song!” See, they want something for nothing.
And Veronica, that’s true, my kids loved Guy Fawkes Day. They didn’t worry much about the political/religious part of it. They just loved the fireworks.
11. pantrygirl on October 30th, 2008
the potato and naked british guy made my day.
12. PatriciaJ on October 30th, 2008
too funny, I can see my two kids having identical reactions to yours…
13. Tisha on October 30th, 2008
I spent my 12th and 13th years in France, in a city that really didn’t have a lot of expats. We dealt with Halloween and Thanksgiving by inviting our French friends to our home to share our holiday with them. (Many later returned the favor by including us in their French holiday celbrations.)
So our halloween party included trick or treating to all of the different rooms in our house, though candy cornwas replaced with candied fruits from the local confisserie. Our costumes were all homemade concoctions from what we could find in our closets… and our Thanksgiving dinner included all american roast Turkey and mashed potatoes, with trimmings of gratin lyonnais, baguettes of french bread, leek pie, and a Tarte aux fraises for dessert. Not your traditional part in either case, but certainly a lot of fun!
14. Rebecca Tompkins on October 30th, 2008
In the past few years, more and more English people seem to have started Trick Or Treating, at least in London. Last year was actually quite a scene, much to my kids’ delight. Not a sacrificial wicker ram to be found in NW London, though, and so now I’m feeling like we missed all the fun!
15. Seana on October 30th, 2008
“We will walk through the woods and send away the evil spirits by yelling Wooo!” sounds like a Monte Python skit. This was hilarious.
16. Caitlin (Roaming Tales) on October 31st, 2008
Great story! I have some potatoes on standby. I was going to buy Chupachups but this is a much better idea.
17. Kim@Galavanting on October 31st, 2008
Too bad they didn’t bring the potatoes to the sacrifice. Could’ve made a nice snack :).
18. Susanna (A Modern Mother) on November 1st, 2008
Too funny and too true.
However, Halloween is catching on here.
This is the first year I had a choice of a huge selection of Halloween decorations from Tesco. They even had that orange and black tinsel with jack-o-lanterns!
We had over 100 trick-or-treaters last night (a record) and ran out of candy.
A bunch of expat friends and kids came over and we had a really good time.
This is the first year it “sort of” felt like Halloween in the states.
19. Jenny Jensen on November 1st, 2008
Too late we found out there was trick or treating on one street in our Dutch town last night. My kids were MAD they missed it after I’d spent so much time explaining that kids do not trick or treat here. We did go to an expat kids costume party today with lots of candy and my traditional Halloween chocolate spider cake which helped assuage some hurt feelings. If we’re still here next halloween, I’m going to have to organize our street for trick or treating..though I’ve been warned that the Dutch also will expect a song or poem before they’ll part with any candy (as they do for St. Maartin’s Day).
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